It’s Over (Warning - Long Post Ahead)

For some reason I thought when I crossed the finish line I would feel different than I actually did. I had envisioned myself falling down on my knees and crying. I think I envisioned this because there were moments where I would find myself in the shower after a long run just crying. My emotions were so high during all of this training, but thankfully I remained calm and collected the day before and morning of the race.

The night before the race we went to the Free Wheelchair Mission Run for Mobility Dinner for the fundraisers who were racing for a reason. It was just what I needed. I needed a reason beyond myself to finish this race. It wasn’t just about me or my personal accomplishments; it was about the people out there that have experienced more pain in their lives than I would the day of the race.

As a first time marathoner I had my share of nerves, but I don’t think I realized exactly how hard it would be. It was brutal. Since my blog is also my journal I am going to do probably add more detail than you care about, so feel free to skip it. Going into the marathon Adam and I had always said we thought we could finish in about 4 and half hours. We didn’t really want the pressure of a time goal, but with all the training we thought that would be a doable pace. The race started off great. It was cool at 6:40 am in Huntington Beach when the gun sounded for us to take our first step of the 26.2 mile journey and we were feeling great. I had a slight sense of panic as I was standing in the huddled mass of 2,500 other people about to run this marathon and felt like I was going to pass out, but I looked at Adam and asked him if I look all white, and he said no, that’s when I realized it was all just in my head and I said a prayer and calmed down. We kept a great pace going; we were at a strong 9:30 minute/ mile pace and were both feeling awesome. The course would take us away from the beach down into Huntington Beach Central Park and there were tons of volunteers cheering us on, it was almost too good. How could I be feeling this good? We climbed up Edwards Hill, and were able to keep a good run pace. Then back to the beach we headed. Right as we turned back onto PCH, Adam’s brother Nat and his Girlfriend Kerri were there to cheer us on at mile 10 and Kerri also passed me my sunglasses which was perfect. I didn’t need them at 6:40 am, but the sun was bright and shining by this time. 10 miles down and we were on our way, still feeling great running at the same 9:30 pace. We hit the half way point and my GPS watch told me we had done the first half in 2 hours and 2 minutes. Not bad, not bad at all. I started to actually think I might make it in 4 hours. But oh, how much I learned after that point. We were still staying strong and keeping up, but the sun was also getting higher and bringing the heat. I thought we’d never get to mile 16, but we did, the only problem, there was still 10 miles left to go. I had hit my wall. It was hot, and I was tired. So, so tired. We decided to start walking though all the water stations to make sure we were getting the hydration we needed. But when the walking started the pace slowed down and my legs got heavy and it was so hard to pick them up. Then at mile 18 or so Nat and Kerri were there cheering us on again, and it was so nice to see a friendly smiling face, I felt a little bit of a second wind. Trouble is, Adam didn’t feel the second wind quite as much. The sun was higher and the water stations were further apart now, and the volunteers cheering us on had all waned and started going home. I was still feeling ok, and did my best to motivate my sweet husband, but at mile 20 he just needed to walk more than I could. I didn’t want to spend an extra minute out there, I was so tired, so we went our separate ways. And it only got harder. So much harder. 6.2 miles to go, that’s just a 10K, that’s nothing, I kept trying to tell myself, but it wasn’t working, and even though there were hundreds of other people around me just trying to finish too, I felt alone, really very alone. I would walk at the water stations still, but I had to stop more often now in between, I would only let myself walk for 30 to 60 seconds just to gather myself and get myself together enough to make it to the end, which I was sure would never come.

Soon enough mile 23 came, and I only had 3.2 to go… just a 5K. I really could actually do this. Trouble is my watch hit the 4 hour mark at about this point too. No, no I wouldn’t make it in that 4 hour time I foolishly thought I might at the halfway point. But now the question was, could I make it in 4 hours and 30 minutes like I thought I could all along? I had 30 minutes to go 3 miles. A ten minute mile would be hard to pull with the way I was feeling. Another prayer, one for me and one for Adam. I wanted to cry. I really didn’t think I would make it under 4 hours and 30 minutes, I became really discouraged. But my competitive spirit kicked in and I pushed, I pushed so hard. And then, Nat and Kerri there to cheer me on at mile 25! Just 1.2 miles to go, and I asked Kerri to join me, she has done 5 marathons herself, and several triathlons including a full iron man, she is a rock star. When I told her how close I was to making it in 4 and a half hours she wasn’t going to let me not make it, she just kept telling me, you’ve got this, you’ve got this. I drank a big cup of the energy drink they had, and felt the urge to vomit it all back up, bad idea. I had to stop and walk for a minute, but only a minute, I was too close to slow up now. And then finally, the finish line, it took so long to be able to see, but when I saw it, I took off, and I crossed the finish line with an official time of 4 hours and 28 minutes and 36 seconds. (Side note: my GPS watch had me clocked at doing a total of 26.46 miles, because of the extra steps you have to take getting around people on the course, you end up running further than 26.2.) But I had done it. I had crossed the finish line, and I was just so, so happy to not be running any more. No collapsing to my knees or tears streaming down my face, just pure joy. I found Kerri and she and I went back to the finish line to cheer on Adam who crossed just a little later, exhausted, but accomplished. It was over, the torture had ended. It was such a crazy journey, from feeling so good, to so bad in such a short period of time. But my body held out and I felt good again. While Adam I didn’t cross the finish line together, this was a great experience for us as a couple and I couldn’t have asked for a better partner to run with, not just in the marathon of the day, but for life, if it weren’t for him I wouldn’t have done it, but I am glad I did.

I can hardly believe it is all over now. 18 weeks of hard work, but it paid off. I can say I am a marathoner. And along the way we raised enough for over 22 wheelchairs to be sent around the world to lift people up off the ground and give them the mobility they deserve. Thank you to all of you for your prayers, thoughts, and donations! What a day.

Run for Mobility!

We did it!