Immediately I felt a little sick. Not sure why, there are plenty of people that I would like to see and catch up with, but for some reason it just feels so awkward to me.
I don’t really have much desire to go. There are only about 2 or 3 people I graduated with that I keep in touch with, (beyond the facebook world) which is actually kind of sad, but it’s the truth. So the potential seeing the rest of these people, many of whom really were once my very good friends, makes me feel like I did a crappy job of keeping in touch and being social.
I think mostly it’s the pressure I feel to look good. I have always been extremely self conscious about my weight and looks, I think it just comes with growing up in Southern California, but facing some of these people who I am sure will look amazing makes me feel so terrified already.
It’s not like I haven’t accomplished a lot in my 10 years since high school graduation, I am not worried about that, but I think it is just such a strange setting to be in. Especially when it’s been 10 years and you’re all still in your 20’s and expected to look great and have these fun filled lives.
I don’t know, maybe it’s the fact that I hated high school, not so much the learning part, just the social game of it all, it was awful for me. Seriously not being asked to prom was more damaging on my self esteem than one would think possible. But it was senior prom and no one even considered asking me, that was the start of 4 years of deep depression.
I am happy to say I am no longer suffering debilitating depression, don’t need Prozac, am happily married, have a great job and home, so why am I so sickened about going to a high school reunion??? Not sure – but I am.
What are your thoughts about these things?
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| I think this cartoon sums it up perfectly - maybe I'll be more ready to go after 20 years... |
2 comments:
you are beautiful whitney! all those people would be lucky to have your life :)
I didnt go to my 10 year. Just didnt feel the need. I still see and stay in touch with the friends that were real friends. I feel like facebook makes reunions obsolete. We all know what everyone is doing already!
I think you oughta go. I think you'll be glad you did, and part of you will regret it a little if you don't. The only people I think wouldn't regret not going are those that immediately dismiss any possibility of doing so ("screw those people, I hated them then and I hate them now!"-style), and clearly you aren't sure, so I say go! If it's lousy from the get-go, you can just leave immediately, right? I went to mine a coupla Octobers ago and I am glad I did so.
--Cousin Robert
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