On being a working mom

The night before I went back to work, I may have been a hot mess.  I cried, a lot.  I couldn't believe I was going to  have to drop Troy off and be away from him for 8 whole hours.  I was so nervous.  I was feeling like maybe I had made the wrong decision.  And then, magically, on Tuesday morning, my alarm went off at 6:45am and I popped out of bed.  Did my hair, put on make up and felt ready to go.  Troy woke up at 7:40 with a smile and I fed him.,  I really think that being able to nurse him in the mornings helps so much.  Just to be able to still bond with him in that way, let him know I am there for him and share that special time made it much easier.  I dropped him on off at about 8:10am with a wonderful stay and home mom who we go to church with. The situation worked out that she could watch Troy for us these two days a week.  I did not shed a single tear at her home, and I got in my car to make that long drive to work, and it was strange not to have a baby in the car with me, but some how it was also a little bit freeing.  I didn't have to keep looking in the mirror to see if he had fallen asleep or was going to cry.  I knew he was in a loving and happy home.  He had two full bottles of expressed milk and would be just fine.  No tears.  When I got to work and realized how much I had missed my little Free Wheelchair Mission Family.  Really, I do love the people I work with and I love the work we do together.  My job is much, much different now, but I eased right in and started in on my project.  I am only in the office from 9am to 4pm, so the days seem to just fly by.  I do have to pump twice while I am there, and that's a bit of a pain, but, hey anything to  have my little man stay healthy and strong, not to mention, it saves money and burns calories. Double bonus.

I picked Troy up at about 4:45pm and he was all smiles, Kim (our sitter) said he was great, that he napped great and ate great!  I was so happy.  Tuesday night was a little hectic, just getting all the bottles cleaned and then ready again for the next day, but everything was just fine. We have a really good rhythm with things now and it's been very, very manageable. 

I was thinking about how really amazing it is to have just this perfect balance.  I am enjoying my days with Troy more now, and feeling good about being able to continuing to work to bring mobility to the world, keep my connections in the work force, and also add to our family income, so we don't have to be so strapped for cash all the time.  (Not that my 14 hours of work a week will make a huge difference, but it helps!) Truly, I am loving life right now. 

Lucky, blessed, fortunate, how ever you want to say it, I am just incredibly grateful for this season in life right now and how things have worked out for us and our little family. 

Love this little man of mine

This face... to die for!

My happy boy